Life is funny isn't it. I mean the way things go.
Yesterday was great!
All the way up till about 2pm. All of a suden i got caught in a wave of 'why's' and thoughts of 'you asshole.'
It stayed with me for the next few hours.
High anxiety. Pains in my chest.
i wrote a letter to him. I had to get it out. i need to let him know he hurt my feelings.
i mailed it to SF.
Today.....Kim goes over to SF's for a planned visit.
Kim does not even slightly understand or empathize with the ex-wife situation at all.
She jut does not get it.
WE have not spoken in weeks.
Yet she has some of the same exact senarios happening in her life!
So unless SF and Kim talk about it. unless SF is able to get thru to her so she understands, i have given up on Kim as a friend. Given up that there's any hope of revival at a later date. She and Mr. Braun are dead to me.
So sad.
Dead people. They really just can wreck a day!
So I mourn the loss of Mike and of Kim.
i mourn the loss of my blog.
I'd been there for so long. I hated having to move. But Its hard enough for me to let go without having him hanging on to me. I may move back. We'll see.
i'm not taking it down cause i wrote some good shit over there!
Anyhow.........
Before I went to the bad place yesterday.......
I fixed my BBQ! put a new ignitor in. How amazing am i! And it works too!
Cleaned out my car, washed it. Did a WAl-Mart run. Dug in the garden some more. Vaccuumed my house. Got ALL kinds of sun!
it was a great DAy!
Today i work!
But it will be great too!

Blog On Dudes!!!