Got home last night after a very long day.
There it was. My answering machine blinking away at me that I have a new message.
'you have 1 new message and 24 old messages'
Frig!
so I listened.
A job! Someone called already from all the resumes I put out on Wednesday! I didn't have a pen and paper handy so I was going to have to listen to the message again. That meant listening to them all.
Fine. I have to clear them out anyway.
As i was going thru. Remebering them and hitting delete.
When there it was. His voice.
He'd Missed me at home and was going to try me on my cell.
Larry.
The tears come up in my eyes.......
WoW! the impact that man has had in my life is incredible.
I think of him every day.
He opened my eyes to so many things.
To life.
Being between jobs as i am and the not knowing how I'm gonna pay my bills next month..........
I just feel so different about it than i would have a year ago this time.
So I'm floating.
I worked all day yesterday for Mr. B.
I loved it!
Realized how out of shape I am when I couldn't lift the things with ease that I used to be able to lift. I actually Scared myself.
I've alwasy been feakishly strong for a girl.
Not so Much yesterday.
If it weren't for Larry I would be in a panic right now about when I will work again. trust me its there. But I am not going to let it get to me.
If not for Larry, I would not have met the Tall Dude.
I would not even give Tall dude the time of day.
He gave me soooo much in the short time we were togehter.
His Gift. So much more than the box of stuff he sent. So much more than the letter with his words of Love to me. His gift is so much more than any of that.
I am grateful for every day. For each day on its own. Cause there honestly may not be a tomorrow.
Will feel like this forever?
I don't know. It would be nice,cause there is just very little anxiety in this place. But I don't know, cause I'm just live each day as it is brought to me.
Told me to love. Encouraged me to love again.
The very last lines of his letter......."Have a great life and PROMISE ME you will love again."
I didn't delete the message on the answering machine.
Blog On Dudes!
6 comments:
Sounds like you are in a good place emotionally right now. Good for you. Take care.
Sounds like you have everything under control... I envy you - I would be having a nervous fricken breakdown - but then again I usually do.
How was the restaurant? I will have to come see you there....
it's good you didnt erase the message. I am so glad you had him in your life, if even for such a short time. =)
So what did you think of the message about the job? Anything good?
yup.
work for the summer on top of the job i already have with Mr. b.
Perfect!!
Sounds like things are falling into place for awhile. Good for you.
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