Halloooooo

R U Coming.......I am cleaning and chopping and I think I'll bake 2!!!

but eye Do need Confirmation DarlingS'

Owning is Not for me I guess

well I will not be a new anything to live in owner anytime soon.
Or anytime later for that fact. Unless Mountain was serious about doing it next year or the year after.
I was approved for enough to purchase a mobile home which is not the end of the world. Accept that the ones I can afford are trash and the ones that are okay are all age restricted.

So here i stay and hope for the best.
Its almost a good feeling knowing there's really nothing I can do.
Moving would end up costing me the same elsewhere in rent once this goes up. So I might elsewell stay in the place we call Home.

Nannygirl is looking for a place with her boyfriend.
Whatever.
So then I can rent that room out to a homestay student!
of course nothing is even happening yet,so there's no use dwelling on it.
But if there's no use dwelling on it, than why do I have this pain in my chest?
I'm on Pinks for frigs sake! I'm not supposed to have pains in my chest anymore.
On the bright side....the anxiety may be what I need to shed some of the 10lbs I've gained since december!

I think my favorite question the bank lady asked was to list my assets.
Huh? I have a car, a dishwasher, washer/dryer, matching furniture.....
Oh only the car counts....ummmm okay.
Its nice to have it confirmed what I already knew.....
Its how much I bring in a month that counts. And for how much I do...a big 70 was granted. funny. it was quite a bit more than I expected. A bigger down paymetn may help a bit, but really. Its the numbers at the end of the month that matter.

I hope its nice this weekend.
i realy need to cut my lawn and weed my garden.

Wanna come over saturday night for girl time?
I'll make stirfry

i am scared and excited for what I will learn at my appointment in the afternoon.
Mountain will meet me there after charlotte's lesson.
I wil need an extra set of ears and questions

What an adventure.....
I am so very positive of it all

Crusty

I love waking up with nose and eye crusty's.
Itchy throat, no voice....

Friggin allergies.

It must really be spring!

i miss it already

keep your fingers crossed for another year......

I Shit & Stomped in It!

Well...here I am.
In true Kristi fashion I got my ducks in a row as soon as I could!

Our home is going to sell.
Its a duplex. So anyone that buys will be buying for an investment. Be that either to continue renting or tear it down and build new. its a huge lot with greenspace behind.
So my rent might go up. Thats not the end of the world.
Having to move .......would be.
So I am going to set up an appointment with my credit union and get pre-approved for a mortgage. See where I stand.
If God is smiling on me I can stay here another year and Mountain and I will buy together Next spring.
I've been on the phone with my brother getting information.
I cried all last night and this morning in Mountains arms.
Spent a few hours outside staring at my bulbs that are continually coming up.
My garden that I've poured my heart into for the last 5 years.
The dirt that i've worked with my hands.
The plants that I moved from our last house when it sold.
The plants that I got from Muck cause she couldn't take them with her.
Charlotte was out today in the Blackberries. Playing. Cutting. Exploring.

This is our Home.

But yes Ladies....everything happens for a reason.
We will be okay.
Mountain has done what he can on his White horse.
keep your fingers and toes crossed that we can stay another year. Otherwise I am looking at trying to buy a 'something' on my own right now. And lets face it.....thats going to be tough.

So no more effort into my garden.
Whatever is there is there. I just weed and maintain.
Charlotte's space.....
Its jsut so heartbreaking.
*sigh*
Life does go on.
any Helpful house/townhouse buying tips will be welcomed

they are selling

ya

sorry

I'd prefer 'other' over laminate flooring

its nice to visit. Just not my first choice to live there

Make sense???

Woa Friday!

Its Friday and I haven't posted since Tuesday!
whats up with that?

Mornings have been short this week.
Been opting for sleeping a bit late and then Excercise over the computer. Go Figure!

Mountain and I had a wonderful DAte on Wednesday night. Dinner and just being out is so nice. Charley was at my parents for the night.
Work has been crazy busy!
i love it!
My parents back yard had a huge washout from all the rain. The environmental people have been there. They will have to fix it this summer when the river and creek get bak down again. In the meatime, mom & dad have had a real estate agent in.
They are considering moving.

I finally have a partner that matches my sex drive. How great is that!
Well its great for me anyhow.
His roomate has requested more baked goods. I sent everything I baked home with him last weekend
So thats nice. I like to feed people.

One day, if it should ever stop raining, I would like to get in my garden. There's weeds and grass everywhere! Spring is here! Its time to get it togehter. The winter did a lot of damage this year. I lost a rosebush even.

Okay.
gotta run.
Excercise to be done before I fly Charlotte off to Bert's for the day!
Frig! What am I gonna do in the summer?!!!

AAAAhhHHHH!

Blog On Dudes

land people

When the landpeoples Daughter calls it just can't be a good thing.

I wasn't home. So now I have to sweat it out till Saturday, when apparently she is calling back.
Nope. She wouldn';t leave her number.
I hope my landpersn is still alive. And that they are not selling the house.

FFFFFFF!

Just Feel

Yup!
Just gotta feel.
all is well.
I just have thick scars from my long and unloved tumultuous past, did I spell that right?
He is not ready to say the words. Never said he didn't love me.....just not ready. So I just need to relax.
He is not one of the others....
He is Mountain Man.
I have to stop being scared of the hurt in my past.


This weekend. I went about my daily stuff and he went about his. Charlotte hung out and it was all very comfortable. My old T.V in the basement, that has been dubbed..Charlotte's T.V. Died Saturday Morning.
Remember Bert....how many times did we Water that poor thing when we lived togehter? I'm surprised it lasted as long as it did!

after one saturday of her in my living room. Skipping and Cartwheeling and just being Charlotte. I knew we couldn't live this way.
so on Sunday off we went to Future Shop. (i had a 50dollar gift card from Christmas for there)
Myself, Charley and mountain hand in hand walking thru the doors.
Charley and Mountain went and played video games, I went and looked at T.V's
I guess I got ignored cause I was looking in the cheap section.
Frig. It took forever to get help! and it only took me moments to find the one I was gonna buy!
Everything is flat screen now. holy Heck!
I Chose an inexpensive 20inch NOT a flat screen model. After the gift card it only cost me barely 50bux! How great is that!
then we picked up a shelf. Off we trudged with our full car and wandered thru car lots in the rain. Mountain sharing his interests with us. Charlotte enjoying looking in and Mountain explaining things to her.
When we got home I made lunch. Mountain and Charley built the shelf and got the Basement room re-arranged. after lunch I got busy with house stuff while Charlotte enjoyed her New T.V. and Mountain took my Christmas lights off the house!
WoW! Is this what it is like to have a man around?
they sure are handy!
Yesterday...we met him at work for his lunch break. Queen and I had been out in the monring running errands. We came home got lunch together and went to his warehouse. He took us on the grand tour......It was neat.
It was more neat that he invited us! Showing off his work. Showing us off to his work.

so I'm ready to tell him before he's ready to tell me.
Big Deal!
Like an Orgasm. It rarely happens at the same time.
I just know that when it does happen he will mean it.

LoVe

When do you fall in love?
How do you know thats what it is?
I used the feelings and the word so freely last year. Before that I was careful who I loved and when.
I used the Word with............... Now I want to use it with Mountain.
HOw do you know when its okay to say it?
would it be an insult now? Would he be offended? Would he believe me! Have I used it too much?

I know there are lots of different loves. Many ways to love, but which is which and what one am I feeling now? he says he's not ready to love me yet. So what does it mean to him?!!! I couldn't talk about it. Memories and fears flooded my mind and all I wanted to do was push. push him out of my life!
One thing I know fersure.....when I love I love forever. I don't 'fall out of love' I don't believe that happens. I believe the love evolves and changes, but it is always there.
Do I say it to him? Once its out there......
If I don't say it can i still run...........run the other way. Out of this relationship.
I don't want to run. He is in my heart and I am happy.
Do i love him? i Don't know. i am so confused

Doc Said........

I had another appointment with my Doc the other day.
Guess what?
He says if I am still doing as well in June as I have been doing the last few months....i get to go off the Pinks!
How awesome is that?
I am very most happy.
Its neat to be able to feel like I'm better.
i know I still have a more healing to do. But I'm getting there. Counsellor says healing time is different for everyone. But my progress since Christmas has been phenomonal!
Its wierd to think where I was last year at this time.
Not only what yu all saw, but what i saw inside.
My thoughts....the inner fights with my thoughts....the hours spent just trying to get the simplest tasks done. The hours spent inside my head. Thinking, thinking thinking. Trying to feel better. Fighting to feel better. FAking it to the world.
I am just in awe of my head alone.
So, so grateful for the mental breakdown that finally sent me over the edge inthe right direction of help.
Did you know I live with anxiety every day of my life?
I will probably continue to do so when I get un-medicated as well.
I mean.....I have been suffering from anxiety attacks since I was a child.
They were actually worse then!
Horrid pains in my chest at 7 years old!
Feeling like I can't breath. It was awful.
Chemical inbalance they say.
Hopefully the list of vitamins and Herbs I have can be a more natural wayonce I'm thru the woods here.
And like the Doc's have said....so I go back on.....it's not the end of the world.
Just expensive.
Then of course there's the baby thoughts. Don't want to be drugged and trying to concieve.
But we will cross that bridge when we come to it.
For now I look forward to June when I can take the dosage down, enjoy the sun, and let nature do its thing.

Blog on Dudes!

Heck & Darn

I peeled my pinky while peeling potato's

Youch!

B & F!!!

Too Drunk to Drive

I am.
2

Mountain asleep in my bed,
a movie
Hunt movie about tornados
I awake.
Love the movie.
The penquin wine,
Bert got me on it!!!!
achardonnay.

Holy Heck.
He is breathing heavy.
I should go to bed too.

Sister.....not lettting go of her old job.
I am drunk.
alls welll. A good place.
Just can't type al; too well

Getting Married

It's a huge step in a persons life.
One, most of us don't think too in depth about.

Well, i for one, have always given it a great deal of thought. Mostly cause I guess I've had enough time to. I've watched so many, many people do it. Young and old. Watched and lived over the last 18 years, how people evolve and change. Frig. I've studied habits, manorisms and characteristics of people over the last 20 at least!
So how many people, in this day and age, think far enough ahead, to....this is the person I want, or Hope, will be wiping my ass after my first stroke?
Graphic?
I hope so. Cause that is the reality of it.
Till death do us part>
was taht in your vows? It sure as heck is gonna be in mine.
Also the vow...wipe my chin and my ass unless we have enough money in pension or disability to hire a nurse!
Really its a question to ask yourseslf before you marry. do I love this person enough too?????
For better or worse>
How bout that one?
Worse can be pretty bad. Midlife, mis-understood, easyily denied, how the Heck did that happen crisis. Evolution of relationships. IT HAPPENS!!!! Frig.
My parents are highschool sweethearts.
they also have seperate bedrooms and are the best of friends. My dad is an asshole and my mom buries her head in the sand. they get along okay and it all works. 41 yrs. You find the path that works for you cause this is the person that is gonna wipe your ass when you need your dignity, and TRULY loves you for real to do it.

This brings me on to weddings.
Now I am not as bitter as I used to be.
Nope. Not sure why. Must be the Pinks.
I think we are born with the dream.
Although, i don't see it in my own daughter. She doenst' play bride. I'm sure by her age I was. with Barbie's.........
hmmmm.
Maybe its a new age thing. Or maybe its cause its not been a thing for her mommy.
Charlotte is being brought up to just be herself. Not an add on. So her brain patterns are diferent.
hmmmm.
anyhow>
I hve an issue with Weddings.
Why are we having and spending so much money on them???
Are you getting married to have the party?
I know I'd be having a HUGE party if i got married. right in my parents front and backyard to be exact!..... BYOB i would only provide food. how's that?
I my parents front yard yard and mid floor of their home. Fair i think.
Most likely i'd be in a colour of dress you'd never forget. Of course reciting my vows earlier with a JP

Not htat I don't think they are wondrful, a lot of fun and beautiful. I have an issue with the whys and reasons.
My mother said something to me a long time ago.
the bigger and fancier the wedding the quicker and bigger the divorce.
Now my mother is not the one to speak wisdom in our family. Its usually my dad.
however.......

I'm sure its probably my personal feelings mixed in with what i learned in church.
you get married by a man of the church....whatthe Fffff were you doing living together! I guess thats good. A 10 thousand dollar wedding should cover it. I mean, you gotta have the dress and you definantly gotta have the pictures.
Oh...you have a baby on the way. oh Prdon. you getting married in in front of God..
oh I Am sorry. Yes of course this is enough money to plan the wedding. But maybe an off-white gown would be better. you can hide the gained baby fat better.
So we all have pre-marital sex.
I know 2 people at this moment that are not under that umbrella.

So the bride is wearing white. Isn't it nice that she is a virgin.
what do you mean the flower girl is her daughter?

so we all have a Dream.
Okay...i even have a dream. but when does the dream begin to insult.
I am speaking as an insult to what is referred to as the Bible

Maybe a lot of you don't know this.
but I started going to a devote mennonite church when I was 10.
I learned a lot.
No I don't agee with it all.
Not that I would ever be able to spit up verses or tell you exactly where or anything...just know I;ve read it is all.
During my teen and young adult years I explored.
Yes i have Read the Bible. Not the whole thing. but Much of it. I have formed my own opinions.
I have looked into sikhs, buddhism, mormans, Catholism, Jehovahs, Wicca

Now the thing is..we al believe.
We all belive in the higher power.
God.
Yet we still all live how we want.
Pregnancis out of wedlock....DAMNED
Divorce.....DAMNED
It went even as far as to say women showing skin....Damned!

But Yet we all belive there is something greater than our exhistance. why?
Our exhistance is pretty great!!

Look
I started out with the pretense that these Fucking weddings are pissng me off. I got so political and religious.
i hardly tipped the iceberg on what i realy feel about that shit!

However weddings....
they are a fun thing. when they are not tied into a religous blah, blah,blah and are just about the union to take place....i am there with String in a Can Baby!!!

As I would of cousre espect your to be.

its Not a Prty without String in a Can and Jello Shooter's!!! Right Muck!???!

blog On!

Skating Lessons

I was approached last night at lessons, as to why Charlotte is not in Figure skating.

This is not the first time.

Very flattering.

He Died

Seems one of Nanny Girls gerbils died today.
she has 3. 2 of them in the same cage.
She came home 40 minutes ago to find the live one eating the Dead one.

EW YUCK!!!

Standing at the bottom of my stairs crying, she's asking for my help.
This is way out of my Super Hero league!
Mountain had just left 15 minutes before. Maybe he wasn't home yet.....
Back he came to save us from the cannabalistic Killer gerbil!
Wrapped poor Devon in newspaper for tomorrows funeral and left.
For the Second time tonight.

I knew these diseased creatures will eat their young...but this is different.
What the Hell!
I can do a lot of things, but that was not one of them.
Mountain is so Wonderful!

Poor Nanny Girl.

Hero presents will have to be found & given!

I was cleaning in my livingRoom. Turned around. And there it was.........


I guess she was hungry

Coming along

Its been so exciting this last week at work.

Since going for dinner With my Mountain on last Saturday night...I got the bug.
We were geting blinds this past Tuesday and I really wanted it to start coming together.
so Out I went on Sunday and picked up a whole pile of plants and Pots. Wal-Mart Never lets me down!!
Seems I passed the bug on to Boss Mitch!
It is just looking so good!
Blinds...plants....So he planted a Herb garden right in our front window!
How cool is that?!!! He can now use fresh herbs in his sauces and stuff! Then he came home with a Palm yesterday afternoon. WE named it Allan. Allan the tree.
Next we will have our *New* menu's.
WooWoo!
Black Leather with our Name etched across the front. ............we've been wating for months for them. They've been on back order forever.......
its just all coming along. As soon as thats done......we will advertise and paper the Whole damn town!
Prices are not Changing. Still only 7.99 for the rice bowl. And the 5.99 Lunch Menu Aint going Anywhere!!!
I think the most expensive item is the Coq au Vin at 22bux! And damn does that stuffed chicken ever look good!
Mmmmm.

....oops...
clikc the wrong thing and you delete stuff!

No Babies Here!

Not a chance!
that would be such a big Oooops its not even funny.

No babies for us....if I can still have them...till there's a ring on my finger and a mortgage with the bank!
That's a few years away
as long as the relationship is still going the direction its going

its nice to be on the same page with someone.

Breaded

So I like food that's breaded. Like schnitzel or maybe chicken.
MaaAN i could go for a McChicken right about now!
Mmmmm. Breading.
Like what about KFC? That is some good stuff!
Got coupons for it today too.
Boyz o'boyz I do love coupons. No I am not ashamed to say so! I love em' and I use em'
Had breaded Veal Neptune for my fancy dinner date Saturday night. Yum!
Still thinking about it.
Frig...am I ever craving a bacon-cheese burger.

What is going on here?
I'm goin' to bed

Ummm Yah

drempt my bottom tooth fell out and the other one was real loose.
A plastic bat I had started flying all about the lake. That was fine cause I flew with it.
And the buns for the sandwiches were all moldy.
But mostly I was very worried about my teeth.

Must've been the blue Cheese I scarfed down before bed

An Intro to my Girlfriend Bert's Blog!

My darling old roomate Berta has gotten onto the blog scene.
She is looking for contact with the outside world. just like the rest of us....LoL!!

Contact her DAmn It!!!

She's a mom. 2 boys. Give her a hand will yah!

Gotta love her job posting....
check it out!

blog On Girl!

Just goes to Show you......

.....you can meet someone once for a brief moment. Then 18 years later be sitting across from them. Having a most Wonderful evening.
The world just got a little smaller last night.

A Date!

I had a date last night with the most Fantastic Man Ever!

Friggin....
......2 weeks of nausea....Cut it out already!!!

Friggin Rogers

What is with Rogers?

I keep dreaming that I am back working for them.
why?
what The Hell.

Hey!! Did I tell y'all that my Baby sister, Sister just got a new job!!

Guess what it is?

Selling Phones!

LOL!!!!
Started last week she did. i'm sure she'll do Great!
Its for a different company than I worked for.
How funny is that.
From Barista to Phone sales!

Just cause I sucked doens't mean she will follow in my footsteps.......

Numbers

I was fixin to go have a girlie visit with Bert.
But with the weather as it is I don't really want to be on the other side of the bridge.
Just not in the mood to be a snow Superstar.
So I will tackle my taxes instead.
sorry Berta.
Tax time......
hope I get money back. I have house insurance to Pay!

These nights are wonderful.

Thursday's are my short work day. Charley has piano. so I get to cook Dinner!
Now Mountain comes every Thursday for dinner too.
He got here last night and the 3 of us sat and listened to each others day while we enjoyed the meal.
I felt like June Cleaver