FUDGE!!

My rent went up again.  Fudge.  Every year.  We're in a recession!  Get over the rent freeze from years past will ya!

went up by 19bux.  Guess I'll be making a call.  #@#%$!!!

Canada DAy tomorrow!  YaY  Canadians!  I have my Canada DAy bows on my house!  I'm proud to be a tacky Canadian!  don't drink Canadian though. Not a fan.  Sleemans Honey Brown......nice.

Feeling better about Berry Fest working.  its still gonna be rough......but not as bad as i thought.  Boss Man thought of me and is looking after me.  I will be in the bar or the store.  Sux cuz Berry Fest is a BIG money weekend for me (ARG) but at least I can still work, not let my team down,  Be part of the team, and hopefully not come out too terribly damaged.  Stupid Leg!  Stupid Owie!  Stupid tight muscles! What The Hell!

Sister has 2 egg sacs!  she had the ulta-sound yesterday.  and at the moment....there are 2!  She was fertilized on June 4.  So exciting.  So hopefully she is able to keep them both and the unfortunate doens't happen.  SAcs absorbing sacs and stuff.......

Yay  Sister!  I will be an Auntie to little ones close by again!  I haven't had that since Muck had her Babies........

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Bitter Much?

One so sudden the other expected.  Both a shock on the same day.

as i tend to my cut foot....................

Things in my life sooo suck right this moment.

Actually, they don't, but my mood is so solemn and so down that it just seems like these trivial things are just so very big.  Or maybe they are very big and I am trying to make them small so I can deal with them and not fall into the depression I am so afraid I see coming straight at me.  Or am I already in it?

Mountain showed up with flowers last night to help cheer me up.  He is soo wonderful.  but alas, i am sad.

Off I go to try and fix at least one thing today that I might have the power to fix!

BaNG!!!

Pyrex is is not meant for stove-top cooking

not Glad

not at all!

Catch 22  

I have too many thoughts in my head.

I have a dull headache and my spine hurts and my hip joints are achy, my neck keeps cracking and.......

i want my body to be 35 again

Charley has been denied to the middle school.  I don't have a plan B

my Dad is awesome.  He is worried about my back and my job and my healing.  SAid that if Boss man pulls any wankers he will make sure I have the money for a lawyer.  I love my Dad

So today is the day we go camping.

Decided to take the Pig - Guinea Pig that is.

Yup we are tenting with a pig.  No instructions with the new tent we've only put up once in the dark.  Mntn coming after  us, so it should be dry till he gets there.  

Blog ON!

Another link!

such an awesome plug!

The other one below, the Food Pages, I know Boss man and Lady read often.  She has not been around as much and she is trying to change.  Altough unsuccessfully and not conistantly either.  But at least........trying - kinda - maybe.  The jazz is now left playing through-out the week.  Just changing for the business of the weekends.  The girls don't get in as much trouble now when they spend time at their tables talking.  So the comments do help.  Hopefully, we can stay away from those Kelly Bundy dresses!

I think cause its totally anonymous and easy it gives a  lot  of people a voice they wouldn't normally know what to do with.

Blog On!

Check out this link!

Nice stuff was said!

feel free to say more nice stuff.  Especially if it has to do with me.  HeHee

CAmping

so its raining.

BAHAHAHAHAHA!

I have to laugh cuz we are to go camping on friday for the weekend.  and As you know it rains every time we go with Mountian.  20+ days without rain and ........... Yup.  Thats about right.

Its ok.  I got smart last year after our last trip of the summer where we were soaked, and it rained under our tarps.  New Tarps!  We will be going prepared!

Not sure about this trip already as I don't quite know how I am going to set stuff up or load my  car or unload or.......the bending lifting action doens't work in my body so good.  I told Charley she will be helping more than usual this year.  She's good with that.  We'll see how it goes.  I just have to take it easy.  No long walks around the lake......Slow camp set-up.  

Enjoy the rain!  i know my plants are.  But drive safe.  Its gonna be slippy out there!

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BETTER

Well there I go.

a good dose of feel-sorry-for-myself and i pick up my socks and get right back at it!

i am good.  I am ok.  I just suffer through this back, leg, neck, spine thing and i struggle to not be depressed.  I just have to remember to keep my chin up and take my Vit B and keep on The Plan i have for the wee bit of money i now have coming in......

you know it sucks!

jsut before this accident I had gotten my savings in a really good place.  I was in charge of my finances and feeling really good about the projection of the summer I could see ahead.  and the BAM!  it all halted, jolted and twisted about.  Depletion.

but I can get back on top.  I just have to make a new plan.  Save harder and keep going!  I'm a month and behind and my savings - *sigh*  its ok.  Its good that I had it.  but now.............

I'm Back on The Horse!

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Guilt

I am living, and have been doing so, in guilt.

Give me an inch and I take a mile.  My guilt is my own.  I haven't wanted to do the final change.  Do I want to now?  I am still not totally sure.  I just don't like the guilt.  Feeling ashamed.  Am I ready to commit to making a difference?  I guess I don't know the answer to that yet either - so I guess I will continue in guilt till I can do it all the way.  Till I really want it..............

I don't like myself today

Charley's First Plane Ride!!

The Queen got her first plane ride.

It was on the Fleet Canuck.  The oldest plane there.  Built in 1946!  Just her and the Pilot.  Randy  something.  She got to fly the plane and everything!  Grand-dad would be soooo pleased!  i lent her my old film camera to get some shots from the air.  Can't wait to see what she got!

How exhilarating it was for her.  We were up and out of the house by 8AM to get her there and in for her flight time of 8:30AM.  Mountain escorted us there in his new Jetta.  I wish I'd gotten more pics.  But it was hard to get what I got.

How did this come about you  ask?

The Abby flight club put an ad in the local paper back in February!  to say that in honor of celebration of their anniversary they were going to offer Free flights to 100 kids in Abby!  All i had to do was send in an email!  So I did!  YaY for reading the paper!

Charley was on of maybe 4 kids that got their own One on One flight.  The rest of the kids were in 4 to 6 seater planes.  The clubs pilots volunteered their time to make this special event happen.  She got a certificate signed to say it really did happen and I bought her a pair of flight wings that were there to go on her camp blanket for commemoration.

What an Awesome Experience!  

Irritated? I think

so I have thoughts

I have feelings

Mountain bought a New car yesterday.  yes he needed one.

there wasn't anything shiny in the glove box.................

Its June.  I hate being "that" girl.  

its Time

after dating a girl for 3 weeks -  Mountains room-mate has proposed to her!

he is converting to Muslim so her family will accept him.

i told Mntn that they will be living together very shortly.  His answer,  we'll see

he better start packing and I better start making more room.  

Driving

So is it speed that kills?  like the ads say.....or is it the Stupid maneuvers and speed just makes it messier?

i watch people all day block crosswalks, scoot across an intersection during a yellow they had plenty of time to stop for, enter the crosswalk when pedestrians are there pushing them to walk faster, run red lights, turn left and honk at the people turning right, right turners turning into the left lane, changing lanes while driving through the intersection, going against the arrow........the list goes on.  Simple every day right of way rules ignored.  

this has been pissing me off for awhile.  I need to do soemthing about it!  

Stupid Leg

Frig.  Doin' pretty good yesterday and then I got a rush jut before noon.  It was my rush.  They were my regulars and they filled up my section!  So just when I thought I was on the road to being able to get those regular hours again.........I Got Smacked Down!  Nope!  Broken.  I hobbled my way through the rest of my shift and now I get up and can already feel the pull in my hip as I sit here.  I have physio again today.  That is gonna suck!  She hurts me every time I go.  The best part is the end when I get to lie there and they hook my up to this cool electrode thing that heats up and massages my sore spot.

i am so pissed off to be so Invalid!

Berry Festival is coming!  I HAVE to be able to work Longer shifts than normal.  Fuck!  its only a couple weeks away!  I don't even know if I'll be able to make it past 4 hrs!  This sucks.  That is a big money making weekend for me!  i am so super pissed!

ICBC

my adjusters name is Lisa.  She is very nice.  I like her.

I had been to physio yesterday so I was mighty uncomfortable in her office.  The sitting on the hard chair can really get to be a pain in my behind.

I signed nothing - accept the paper that released the $$$ dollar cheque to me.

Not signing any of the authorizations just means I have to get all the paperwork for them.  I can do that.  At least I will know what they are looking at from the Doctors office.  WE'll see.  If it gets to be too much -

the cheque was to help with lost wages.  She ball parked it.  she figured 40hrs and then thru in extra for tips, I told her i don't count tips.  I came home and did the math of hours myself.  49.15 since May 11 till June 5.  Tips?  Well I like to keep that to myself.

That money will come off my end money of whatever settlement she offers me in the end.

All i know is that i have been making the best of the half days as much as I am able.  As the pain becomes less, I will make more of them.  I was hopeing to be back full-time by the end of this week!  but i don't think so.  I'm not starting off too good.

my Lunch partner goes to court today.  During the week of my accident, his wife left him and took the kids and hasn't let them talk to him since or taken them to school.  Its all very messy and stupid.  So I worry for him cuz he's going before the judge today and I hope he doens't do his impression of an arrogant Frenchman.

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Why can't beds make themselves?

New Underclothes are Under-rated

bought myself some New panties.

i  like new Panties!

and I gave into the next size up.  It was hard to admit - but well worth it.  I am comfy!

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Its nice to wake up in not so much pain today.

My deep core must be healing.  YaY Healing!

of course I say that now and then I'll go to work and it will be uber busy and I'll be limping by the time I get home.  

Physio was good.  I go back twice next week.  I meet with ICBC on Monday.  I finally have an adjuster.  Her name is Lisa.  So I can take my stuff in and she will give me money for my losses so far.  At least thats what I've been promised.  We will see.

I am still stiff in the spine which i find odd, but apparently thats normal?  Mostly I concentrate on my wingy leg and lower back.  Its always a constant ache that never seems to stop, but changes daily.  At least i can go up and down stairs again.  Its slow to go but I can do it.  I hope to be back to my bouncing, jumping, running self in a few more weeks!

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Love is an Interesting Thing!

Here i am with this man.  We have had ou

When will I learn

my opinions don't matter.  they are not going to change the world.  not everyone lives like i do or how I think they should.  decisions and choices are just that and we own them even if we don't admit to them.  I am a bitch and sometimes I wonder if I  am a nice person

 - NO this is not about Mountain and Teaghan.  This is about me.  Mountain and I are fine. he knows where I stand with Teaghan.  I compromised.  She can come to my house for SHORT visits and not everytime he has her.  I will Not walk on eggshells and treat her with the kid gloves he does.  I will not stand being second guessed or talked badly to, be him, if/when I scold the girl.

this was jsut about me and me keeping my judgemental mouth shut!

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I Disliked this Weekend

so we got into it.

he just rolls over!  its so frustrating.  Doesn't give way to any discussion or fighting or compromising or........ArG!

Imean, i guess i can see why Leah always gets her way.  He gets bitchy and drops the F-bomb a lot, but really there is no "fight"  I mean there is but.......its hard to explain.  I guess what I am saying is that I could have me way anytime cuase he just does it.  

Does that make sense?

Hmmmm......like I said i don't want her here and he was like pised and told me I was a fucking bitch and cold-hearted and then taht was it.  He just wasn't coming!  The door is wide open for discussion and he stands on the other side.

I suggested she come for dinner.  He was all worried that i was going to be a bitch.  I told him that I wasn't about to treat her with gloves on and if he was worried than maybe he needs to make a different parenting choice.

they came for dinner.

I drank my face off.

My girlfriend Kodi came over to be with me.  She met the kid.  She's not a fan either.  So that was nice.  Its not just me.

then they left and said kid puked all night, becaseu her mother had her out all day in the sun and she got heat stroke.  I got a call in the morning from Mountain.  I told him to call the mother and get her home ASAP!  then I suggested to come by here first as I have gravol for the ride.  They came, gave her a gravol and then they didn't leave!!!!  Charlotte and I left!  

Anyhow there is more but I have to go.

later -