So i have this daughter.
she is 7 going on 8
when Big and I were dating he would only come over after she was in bed. She was very young (3) when we first started dating so that was just how it had to be. And it was pretty easy cause T.V hasn't put stuff in their minds at that point. As she got older it did start to get more difficult.
He would sometimes spend part of the night and always be gone before she got up. If she got up in the night it was easy to deal with as she was too young to put anything togehter as I would hurry off to her room in order to keep the body in my bed a secret.
we didn't kiss in front of her. These were things that were easily kept. She didn't notice. It wasn't soemthing she was even aware of that happened between adults.
Totally Off her radar.
Well............
She has been noticing things. Things like how Steph and her hubby. They are so very affectionate. Charley has soaked that all up. Her little mind is working.
Yesterday afternoon Tall Dude stopped in.
Charlotte went next door to play with her friend.
WE made out on the couch.
With the whir of the dishwasher going we didn't hear the front door open and the footsteps up the stairs.
I opened my eyes and over Tall Dudes shoulder I could see The Queen. Looking,staring, not knowing what to do.
Her friend had been called for dinner.
she came bounding upstairs cause she really likes the Tall Dude and was excited he was here!
It was only kissing, but still. For a little girl thats never seen her mommy doing that............
Tall Dude left.
Charley and I talked about what she saw. She's good with it. Embaressed but okay.
He came back later on in the evening after she's gone to bed. The evening progresses and we lock the door behind us.
At about Midnight there is a knock on my door.
Its Charley.
CARP!!!!
we were only talking but still.
i tell her I'm checking my e-mail.
In the morning she climbs into bed with me and she asks me straight out if Tall dude was here in my room with me last night.
she heard voices and she saw his Truck outside!
What!!!!
Frig!!!
She is a smart cookie!
She heard voices. My bedroom door is shut so she checked to see who was here that i could possibly be talking to in my room!
Little slueth she is.
Frig!
Frig!
And Double Frig!!!
what did I do???
Well I played dumb of course.
12 comments:
how about the truth??? you were only talking, right? nothing wrong with that.
eventually she is going to figure it all out... and then do a rewind in her mind and put together the pieces. kids do that. And, you are a smart cookie, so it is not surprising that charley would be too! =)
Maybe it is time to have a talk about dating Tall dude, that you enjoy spending time with him and that adult time(whether it is just talking or otherwise) sometimes requires privacy.
You'll find a way to help her understand your needs without haveing to expose her to more than you want. My guess is, that charley wants her mom to be happy and would enjoy sharing your excitement with you.
i think some of that didnt come out quite the way it was in my head... but i am sure you get the general idea of where i am going.
I'm scared of the broken heart I had to peice back togehter for her when big split.
I just don't want her to know he's here at all. Thats my issue.
The truth would and will be fine........later. Just now its too soon. I think anyway.
I'm just trying to protect her
I agree with Shari. I think she has it figured out already, otherwise why would she think to look outside. It is better she knows through you other than some other friend explaining it to her wrong...at least if you tell her you control what she does and does not need to know.
Carp? Is that suppose to be carp or did you mean crap? Or does it mean something else and I'm just not getting it?
Sam
Truth
Yes Truth!
i am all about telling her the truth.
To her it was the middle of the night and far too late to be entertaining. And mommy don't you entertain in the livingroom??
She has seen Tall dude more in the last few weeks than she Ever saw Big in the 3 yrs we dated!!!
I jsut worry about the attachment thing.
T.D. and I have to be more sure of "us"
than more exposure and truth....no problem.
For now.....we just have to be more careful and rewrite the ground rules.
Honestly its my issue and I wasn't ready with the answers when the questions came. Froze you know.
i will be in the future.
Cause the truth is....we were only talking. We were Naked and talking....but talking all the same!!
If you keep trying to hide it and she keeps noticing it, then I think you are making a mistake. Just my opinion.
I'm no child psychologist, but you seem to have things figured out pretty well. Oh, and what Shari said too. :-)
I agree with Shari. I don't have children so maybe I shouldn't even comment but I will anyway. Children are always....always happiest when there parents are happy. It gives them such a sense of security. I think you should share with Charley how you feel about Tall Dude and that this is something that you want and it makes you happy. But I would add that saying you were e-mailing when you were naked and talking "wink" was probably wise. I know she wants you to be happy but that is a visual that may cause a need for therapy..haha
Honesty is the best policy.... :)
My Dad dated when I was a kid. I was ok with it, though I had my own opinions about his dates, and they did not always jive with my Dad's. In retrospect I think my opinions were better. :)
That's a great story. Waiting for more. Diebetes medication Play duel master the card game Rv water heater tv magic vidcaps http://www.side-effects-of-zyrtec.info/Anti_virus_checks.html buick riviera v belt replacement vibrators Tv cabinet+corner+au Dryers kenmore repair Sports bathroomtoothbrush holder set
Post a Comment