Sunday, March 01, 2009

bite your tongue!

its tough for me you know

i have just become so out-of-line bitter towards this child.  So much in fact i can't even justify it.  I can not look at her without cutting her down inside my head.  
So she's just been to a birthday party dressed like that.
Her hair a bedraggled mess.  Her see thru leggings with lace on the bottom.  Its been snowing, why are you in those littel shoes and No socks!
this morning - the black t-shirt that pronounces her to be a ROCK STAR with a guns and Roses type emblem on it.  hair brushed but already in disarray.  Your going snowboarding.  Its going to be a mess.  I have to just walk away.  I can't even be a part of the conversation.  She is argueing with Mntn about putting it up. The fact that this little girl doens't own one pair of water-proof mitts/gloves.  All she owns is the fluffy cutesy knit ones.  I get the knit cheap ones.  I understand that.  Between Charlotte and I we could outfit an army with the many pairs we have.  However, Charley also has one pair of water-proof ones for when she plays in the snow.  Becasue she is a kid!  Thats what kids need.  Thats what kids do!!!   I just don't get why her mother - They are not that expensive.  I paid 5bux for Charleys!  Than she got a really nice pair for Christmas cuz she put it on her Christmas List cuz  I, her mom, is smart like that!!!!
no I don't really want her here for dinner.  
but I spinned it nice.  I think she will be very tired and needs to get home.  After supper will be 7 and she has school tomorrow.
So I got to get away with a couple months of being Teaghan free.  Guess her mom needed the time to herself and gramma would't take the darling little princess.
They'll probably be home after lunch.  DAmn!  Guess i better enjoy the next couple hours to their fullest!  Till they come home and she is here again.
I am just a bitter, bitter bitch.  So much anger brewing, never been validated, never been resolved.  It has grown into its own entity.

I will just bite my tongue

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