tears

the tears role down my cheeks.
they are so warm i barely notice them.
funny.
Yet as big as an elephants I'm sure.

I need to go to him.
i must go to him.
I want to go to him.
these tears make my eyes so dry after. My eyelashes clump togheterh. I am so tired. so numb.
The words in my head. Keep repeating themselves.
my mind won't stay quiet.
I keep thinking of ways.
Of solutions.
Of things.
He can't be alone right now.
he needs me. He may not admit it, but he does.
Keeps thinking of whats best.
Don't worry about whats best.
Not now. Not now!
you may not have that much time to worry about whats best.
i have lots of time to worry aoubt it. To deal. To heal.

and YES Harrison you do to!!!!
Need me that is.
Stop Pissing me off!
you know how you piss me off!!
you don't need to be the strong one in this!
Not for the part where you are alone.

I want to be there with you.
I want to find a way to be there with you.
You and I need to find a way for me to be there with you Damn it!!

Charley and I will come to you.
if theres a way, we will find it.
And we will.
Help me find a way to be there with you...................

My feelings are so deep.
So new. But so deep.
i want to love you....but its still all so new. Now maybe never getting the chance to love you.
Never getting the chance to find out if we, if you, if it was the 'all' we have both been looking for.
Months of beign awkward. days of being friends. Weeks and weeks of being more.........
Please let us find a way.........
there's got to be a way.

There just has to be soemthing.