So Mom has been lurking over on my photo-blog. I wonder if she tried to get in here and got the big UNINVITED sense to it all......
I hope so. Maybe I can go back to a full on blog. Then again....at least Now I know exactly who's reading. The Evil anonymous or 'me' or good anonymous.....ect. can no longer wierd me out.
What a beautiful weekend.
i gardened of course. Mountain mowed my lawn. He is Such a Good man.
Charlotte was at a birthday party yesterday afternoon, so we got to indulge in some most fantastic afternoon sex! Aaah yes. How Fantastic it was!
I have decided just to weed and spread seed in my garden this year.
Its wierd to think I might just all of a sudden not be here. My lilac is budding like crazy. I can harldy wait.
I wrote a letter to a friend yesterday that made me think a lot about Mountain. I'm glad that it shows thru here in my blog how very happy and content I am. How wonderful he is and how lucky i am to have him in my life.
I started to reflect on the past 20 years. 20 years of tears and trying and wishing. years of dreams jsut tossed aside or afraid to be seen. Years of broken hearts and painful, truly Awful relationships.
i can honestly say I've been thru more shitty relationships and emotional pain than most I know.
Mountain and I met 18 years ago.
He was dating a girlfriend of mine. this is somehting we just only recently figured out.
Over the next many years....we have been at the same parties....drank in the same bars and clubs....been at a common friends house...... I Never gave him a second look. He smoked. He smokes Pot. He is a blue collar worker.....What could he possilby have to offer me?
Parallel paths for 18 years and finally colliding last June.
Well.....because of 20 years of crap I sure have it figured out. I now see his worth. His value. i wouldn't have even seen a couple years ago.
He is an amazing man. Truly beautiful.
WAding thru all the bad stuff has soo been worth coming out on the other side.
Those were and are important lessons I HAD learn. Had to experience. I had to go thru Hellin order to appreciate.
I'm sure there will be more that we will wade thru. Only now, we will be waist high together.
Muck you are right. He is a man's man and Yes this house has been a true blessing to Charlotte and I.
Mountain is sticking around.
He's met my family. He's still sticking around. he is Really not going anywhere.
WoW!
Blog on Dudes
25 comments:
What an interesting blog. I liked your thought flow there.
(((((((hugs))))))))
Good to see you in such an awesome place.
Isn't it funny how our priorities change over the years!? You truly deserve to be happy!! You should let him read this post! :)
amazing. :)
I to have experienced the same parallelism...have I told how I came to meet my husband???
But in the end you found what you really NEED....not what you think you want.
A good lesson to all of os is to appreciate what we have a lot more and stop stressing about what we don't have..
And yes your happiness does shine through..in more ways than words!
i dont like pot...
yeah...that is kinda weird that he still does it. Otherwise congrats.
we all make exceptions for our mates that others of us wouldn't
very true i guess - i have always felt that way about drugs - but that is a whole other post...
to each their own.
Hey we've all got our monkey..shopping...nite caps..chocolate..hell cheese and wine(mmmmmm)..pot(drugs)
As long as it's not affecting our loved ones...splurge...everything in moderation is good
And DON'T ever feel guilty about it!!
Okay.... I just can't keep my damn mouth shut!! I don't think drugs, eating disorders, alcohol abuse, or any other abuse........ falls under the same category as accepting one's 'quarks'. To each their own and we all have our deal breakers. Just remember the example you want for your children and if you expect them not to do it what kind of standard is being set. I wouldn't marry my hubby till he quit smoking. (Maybe I'm a controling bitch.... okay well I am but....) I didn't want the health risks for him, me or my kids. I also don't agree with doing things we don't want our kids to do. There is an age limit on driving and drinking that they need to understand and things that adults are allowed to do that they aren't but what about when they grow up..... if adults they know and trust do certain things they will see them as safe and appropriate things to do. I wasn't going to say anything.... then Jewels the pot stirrer had to mention! I don't know mountain, you or your life.... and perhaps this habit seems better than others you have accepted in the past...perhaps he is ready to grow up now??? Or maybe it doesn't bother you and we should just all nevermind! Glad you are truly happy! I don't mean to be a party pooper! :)
What could he possilby have to offer me?
Hmmmm happiness??
This was a great post...
oh FOF - you read my mind. I have always been a prude when it comes to this subject - I cannot stand drugs. I have never understood them. We (my husband and I) separated from those people who do them along time ago. I think it's called growing up - but like I said - I don't have to live with him - to each their own - this is just my opinion - but drugs should not be considered a "monkey."
oh Please.
Get over yourselves!
I'm not even ging to get into when or how or who is watching.
Like I said.....
I've had lessons to learn in life.
Thanks Chelle.
Yes. Happiness.
He takes interest in myself and Charlotte. He takes care of us and lends a hand by not only helping by cutting the lawn each week. but helping me in the kitchen with dishes and cooking. He supports me when I scold charlotte and is another voice.
So if he chooses to have a couple hoots...when he is at home.....ONCE A WEEK IF HE IS LUCKY...then I don't see it as being any different than anybody else having a gin or a vodka or a glass of wine in the evening to unwind.
I agree with both sides. Sometimes your deal breakers aren't as concrete as you might think. hmmmm,Kristi. Wait till someone pushes your dealbreaker fof you might find your love for that person over rides what they did. I think if he wants to make adult decisions and is willing to accept that there might be consequences well it isn't kristi's problem. Sometimes it is only about how you feel, not what you know.
Like I said.... I don't know the situation or you or mountain. I am So glad you are happy. We each have our own deal breakers and we are all different from eachother. I wasn't trying to offend you in any way.... I just didn't think having a legal drink or a piece of cake was in the same league as drugs. When I had kids alot in my life changed as to the kind of things I wanted to influence them. Again personal choice.... I am a prude! Just the big poopy pants! I guess where I have the hardest time relating is the whole together but seperate concept. I don't have things I keep from my hubby, yes he is an adult and decisions are his to make but if my hubby robs a bank... damn straight it's my problem....it's gonna affect way more than just him. It will affect me, our kids...etc. Marriage is different from dating though. I didn't mean to rain on your parade. Just a prudish perspective on things! I really just meant to say: maybe it was something he was willing to give up if he knew it bothered you. You have been accepting it for him, maybe he is willing to give it up for you. That's all. :)
hey - i think it's cool that we are able to voice our opinions - i mean that is why we blog isn't it?
whatever for you and your family is up to you -
Mountain and I will always have separate but together things.
i, for one, have been a whole person for a long time now. On my own. doing it all.
So has he
its Pot. Not Coke or Crack or Meth.
he doens't steal to get it.
he's not a lifestyle smoker. He doesn't sit night after night hot-boxing. Or doens't get things accomplished because of it.
Its how he relaxes once in awhile.
it doens't affect me or Charlotte.
Nor does it affect his 'adult' choices...thanks steph.
I personally can't stand it.
However......if I weigh it out.
He accepts my Pinks. he accepts me for everything that I am. And lets face it. I am a lot to handle soemtimes.
And I accept him for all that he is.
If I have to change him then he is not the one for me. If he chooses to stop Great! If not, whatever...
I had to go thru a lot of crap to get here. I had to learn a lot of lessons. There was a time I woulnd't have touched a guy like him with a 10 foot pole! as a matter of fact I didn't!!
It was a long and difficult operation to get the pole out of my Ass and the adjustment on my "i'm too good for you judgemental attitude" Was a bitch to go thru. I still get relapses every once in awhile, but I am coping.
As far as deal-breakers.
Had my share already thanks.
Personal preferences in life are just that and no one else can judge for you ... they can only judge for their own choices. It's really cool that things are settling down for you and MM. Every relationship has a lttle bit of compromise in it in order to work and as you say, he tolerates yours, so its fair turn about!
WOW..ladies...You know what..WE ALL DO HAVE OUR MONKEYS and suppression of them may be just that. No one is perfect..and as long as children live in happy loving homes and women find loving supportive, inspiring, etc..partners, and we are all sincere about what drives us...GOOD FUCKIN ON YAH..No body is shoving needles in their veins, or on the pipe all day!!!
Smokin a joint once in a while or enjoying your wine or eating the things you LOVE DOES NOT MAKE YOU A BAD PERSON.
Just for the record I don't think I'm better than anyone else and I don't think anyone is a bad person here. I had friends when I was younger with parents who did casual drugs (pot) and all of said friends ended up getting into drugs, my father in law is a drug and alcohol counselor, my sister is a cop...I have seen the bad side of drugs and I just don't like them. But hey... I don't like bungee jumping or skydiving either! Just because we disagree doesn't mean we think poorly of others. :) Kristi, I think you are wonderful ... I don't think anyone has to handle you... you have a LOT of positive to offer!
pot experiences with men in my twenties and pot experiences with men in my...ummm....late thirties is very diferent. As it will be for anybody going thru the times.
Most of the time it leads to other mod enhancers...no its not good.
Other times it jut doesn't.
and thats what we are talking about here.
no different than saying you enjoy a bottle of wine with your partner on a Saturday night after the kids are in bed.
it doesn't alwasy have to be to the extreme FoF!
I am the first person to say Drugs are Bad. Frig! The cartlidge in my ear was broken from having my head bashed into my car gear shift and steering wheel becasue the guy was so fucked up and I said No.
so hey....if I say this is okay.
It is.
thank-you that you think I am wondrful F. I think you are too. And I love how you speak your mind.
Put some more years on you and you will be me.
blog on
Ha, a couple of tokes a week in the Kootenays is practically non-use!
Wow.....what a discussion.....and I'm surprised at myself that i haven't yet thrown my 2 cents in!! lol But nah....I don't wanna piss anyone off ;)
And Kristi....I definitely think it's ok that you and mountain have separate but together lives. I think it's healthy. AND if the worst thing he does is smoke a little pot now and then? Who cares??
I totally agree with what Steph said!
No offense to FOF....but I think the real world is gonna come crashing down around you at some point. Hope you are prepared.
Everyone falls from their horse sometime, the higher you are the harder you fall...
"Wait till someone pushes your dealbreaker fof you might find your love for that person over rides what they did" .... Steph: My hubby laughed out loud when he read this! His quote "Nope, not my wife!" Been like this my whole life, was funny looking back on report cards back in grade 1 and on .... the teachers comments.
As for living in the real world... my world doesn't have to include drugs to be real! I'm always prepared! :)
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