out for Pho last night.
I am so annoyed
to the point where I actaully with-held sex!
I never do that, but I really just didn't want to.
As a matter of fact I realy didn't even want him over. and tonight he is coming and I don't want him then either.
I am tired, annoyed and throwing my arms up in the air.
i don't like the kid.
I try, but I don't like her.
She's a manipulative little tramp. Tramp? No, not yet. But give her a couple years. the girl has more bling than I do! She tattles. I hate that. Her raspy voice that is used in the too loud region. There are a bunch of other things that make me not like her......biggest is her mother.
Oh get this.
Mountain says ....she (the kid) is confused about our relationship. Wonders if we are getting married and all that stuff. I guess her response is what about her mom?Aren't they going to be togheter.
Well stop going for dinner and doing just the 3 of you shit DumbFuck!!!!
What is thedraw?
Why can't he see that what he does is not only wrong, but it hurts me?
Everything else about him is wonderful. He is so thoughtful and kind, but this. this huge thorn. Every few weeks.......
maybe he does. Maybe its a case of having some cake and eating it too. maybe i am the one that needs to shit or get off the pot.
I don't know. I dont' want to lose him. Adn that feels like my only option.
Maybe we can talk about it tonight.
Maybe tonight he will hear me, feel me, and listen.
And if he doesn't..............
than what?
Somethings gotta give
9 comments:
No ulitmatums.... no shitting or getting off the pot.... just you speaking from your heart! Talking about how it makes you feel and talk about how it's influencing the young girl... misleading her. Speak honestly and don't hold anything back but refrain from attacking or being angry. You don't have to loose him over this... you guys just need to find some middleground!
and if he doesn't join me on the middle ground........
I guess he's made his mind up where his priorities are. I think it needs to be explained as though you are planning to get married... making that commitment to each other. Yes you each have pasts but your future is TOGETHER... you join as one... and setting that groundwork should be now.... gettting into habbits and patterns of respecting eachother in your lives. The kids brattiness... you just have to put up with... I wouldn't even bring that up, it's neither of your places to discipline her. No different if you had a friend who had a bratty kid, you just smile and put up with it... curse when she leaves! If it's something that hurts you I don't see any reason why he wouldn't want to meet you in the middle ground. How do explain things to your kids when you have them... where is daddy going, why can't I come. If this is going to be your family you guys need to define it... together! Eachother being number one priority! I know it's always been you and Queen too but the reality is she will grow and leave you ... so you need a team mate who is on the same page as you!
i disagree - this has gone on long enough! time to get this over and done with...
OR - put up with it and move on!
(this is me giving tough love)
but come on! this bothers you! and it should -
Yes, It would bother me too! BUT... you are talking about a man who has 'adopted' a girl as his own... and he has no legal rights... SO ... he has to jump through moms hoops to maintain his relationship with his daughter. I just know that anyone who gave me an ultimatum I would walk just based on the fact that they gave me the ultimatum. There is a little girl who is in the middle of this all. By offering him tough love will only push him away. Making him understand and opening his eyes to your perspective is much more effective!
i think J was giving me the tough love.
we have had half of the conversation awhile ago.
No ultimatums.
there is a party this weekend that the girl has been invited to and he is expected to bring her. I let him know today that C and I Will going too!
That means picking her up from the mothers house.
I will be there with Bells on!
Good luck with how it all works out. As she gets a bit older and teenybopper, I bet it will fizzle out naturally. It all depends if you want to wait it out or not I guess.
I think that it is the fact that he does jump through the hoops that bothers you so much... the fact that he is still so connected to this "former" family that he is willing to jump hurtful to you or not. Someone that knows they are hurting you and continues to do it... I am not sure what you do with that, but what you are doing isn't working because you are still hurt.
so i will try something new.....be by his side. See how that works
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