I sent Kori a mail yesterday morning to apoligize for not coming on SAturday. As I know Mountain hasn't done any such thing yet. this was the correspondance.......
Kristi M. Lastnamesdon'tmatter
9:34am Jan 15th
so sorry we didn't make it on Saturday.
I've been picking up extra shifts at work. 8AM comes pretty early when you've worked and 11 hour split the day before.
I'm sure you much had fun!
Kori B
9:38am Jan 15th
sall good I just really wanted Lyle there.. for Jonahs birthday kinda means alot to me .. he was there the whole time when I was preggers .. and I love him for it!!!
~kori~..
not that I didn't want you there or charlie.. Lyle just is a real special friend and It would have ment alot to me if he were able to come.. but i guess he wasn't allowed..., ??? Kori B
9:40am Jan 15th
LOL i was just kiddin sweetie.. lol
and that was it.
I have not responded cause I just don't know what to say. i don't believe her to be kidding. Anyhting that I write is not going to have a nice undertone. Or I might just be Real direct. I havn't had the chance to bring it up with Mountain yet. Still not sure if I will or what to say to him either.
What do you make of it?
am I reading between to many of the, you are so dis-respecting my relationship Bitch, lines??
truth is, i told Mountain he could take Charlotte and go if he wanted.....he chose not to.
I am still trying to figure out why the sudden change of heart for him and now I have the fact that my first instinct was true. I wasn't invited. So that only makes my mind Whir and I am coming to believe the rest of my instincts are hitting the mark too!
He and I really need some alone time in this house to get this stuff all on the table and not worry about "who" is listening.
5 comments:
I wouldn't respond at all... except maybe with a Happy Birthday or something totally NOT even giving any response at all to her comment. Trying to see your reaction. If you validate it and say something she will think you are defending yourself. You know the truth who cares what she thinks? The alternative is that Mountain didn't want to come and she's not as important as she thought so it's easier for her to blame you. You should really blow her away and respond with something like.... "Thanks for understanding. Happy Birthday to your little man. I would have loved to come to share it with all of you because I know how much you value Lyle's friendship. I know Charlotte would have had a good time too!" Kill her with kindness and concentrate on your relationship with Mountain.
People always assume its the woman that keeps the man from going out. Cause he has no mind of his own ..right? Dave's friends all think that I am the bitch who never lets him out, when in fact its his decision to stay at home.
They are going to resent you cause they are used to Lyle going to these things, being there, but now he is choosing different things. And they are going to assume that you are the one forcing the change.
You just gotta let it go. Cause who really cares what these people think?? He is choosing to be with you and Charlotte so how is that a bad thing? Hit delete and move on.
9 times out of 10 it is the woman telling the man he cannot go (sorry Shanna but it's so true)
she may not go as far as to say "No you cant go!" but there are other tricks that work just as well!
that being said - even if you had told him not to go - that is none of her business!
She sounds like a right case ... this would not be someone I'd want my daughter hanging around with on any level. She might pick up on the two faced attitude and manipulation and (however small) it might rub off. Chances are the kid is a replica of learnt behaviour of the Mother. Maybe you just need to let Mountain know that he is free to continue that relationship if he wants, but to leave you and your daughter out of it from now on???
It's not so much "letting" but prioritizing. I think typically guys just don't think about the big picture. Sometimes they need to be reminded.
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