How do I Reach Back?

Hi Kristi,

Here's my email address if you wanted to add it to your contacts.- tonyf70xxxxxxt or anthony_afxxxxxx.  

To tell you the truth Kristi, I am extremely depressed. I miss Lucy more than I ever thought I would. I want to be with her so very bad. I feel her spirit in me and that brings me comfort. I sometimes talk to her at her memorial at the cemetery and at home.

I cannot return to the beach where I scattered her ashes. There were even little fragments of bones in the ashes, my Lucy bones. It's so very painful to think of that.

I'm not happy here on earth anymore, I have no desire to be here and absolutely no will to live. I don't go anywhere and I can't get out of bed. I have no one. I'm ready to go whenever God is ready to take me home. I think I'll be with Jesus & Lucy sooner than I think.

I wonder why God didn't take me when Lucy died. I wanted to go with her then. Oh well, it's gunna be very soon now, I can feel it, I can't wait to be there with my Love, Lucy.

You'll read all the details of whats been happening here in the letter I sent to you. Should be there by Tuesday. I'm glad to hear you are still with Lyle and that Charlotte is growing up so well & healthy.

Don't worry about me, I still have my precious little kitty-Lu and my Mom calls sometimes. And I'll be in a better place soon enough, I'm sure.

Take care, you've always been a great friend, a little harsh at times, but it's been great knowing you.

 

Bye for now,

Tony.

I received this last night.  I haven't heard from Super Tony in awhile.

He lost his wife last summer to Cancer.  She's had it since they were married and they'd been married at least 7 years.  It wasn't a surprise that she died.  But it was to him.  

She'd started 4 or so years ago with a tumour in her uterus as big as a football.  she had everything removed.  Uterus ovaries total and complete hysterectomy.  It was very sad.  She was only 21.  She went through extensive treatments.  Then they found more cancer - it never stopped.  The cancer wanted her.  In the end she was riddled with it in every part of her body.  Bones, brain, skin, she was never going to make it.

 They'd gone through that thing that I can't remember the name of now, that families go through to prepare you for the inevitable.  

They and he had been through lots of death counseling before the day came and after.  yet he was completely surprised the day she died.  Utter shock!

The letters I had gotten from him a few weeks before had been about how how she was getting better.  Even though the doctors had told them both that she was gonna die and would maybe not make it through the month.  He's even mailed me from the place that i can't remember the name of, that families stay.  its like the final stop.  When you hear the name you'll know what I'm talking about and everyone knows thats it.  Its just time to wait for the end.  

But not Tony.  I've never experienced such complete denial before.  Compete ignoring of the obvious.  I felt bad for him and annoyed at the same time.  I wanted to help him through her departure, but he was never letting her depart.  Now I get this coded letter.  Do i contact the police and put him on suicide watch?  He is on the Island.  

There is a point where positive thinking is great, but sometimes,  no matter how positive you are, reality - i don't know.

What would you do if you got this letter?